


Guilty

by S__lander



Category: Dimension 20 (Web Series)
Genre: Bi-Curiosity, Comfort/Angst, Demisexuality, Fluff and Angst, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-11
Updated: 2020-06-11
Packaged: 2021-03-04 04:00:07
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,657
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24657217
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/S__lander/pseuds/S__lander
Summary: Riz feels guilty about what happened with that creature that resembled him, and Baron. The things Baron told him in the nightmare forest got to him, and Riz starts to doubt himself.Fabian notices that Riz is acting oddly, so he tries to reach out to his friend.
Relationships: Riz Gukgak/Fabian Aramais Seacaster
Kudos: 53





	Guilty

**Author's Note:**

> This took me sooooo long. I'd very much appreciate it if you could point out typos or anything that seems to not line up with the rest of the story.  
> This is supposed to be a more fluffy angst story, so the characters might be slightly ooc, but again, we haven't really seen Fabian be like this before and he's probably still trying his best to be open.  
> Riz both bottles his emotions up to much and might be demi-sexual or on the spectrum, so I tired something with that.

Riz had felt awful when he heard his lies had manifested into a humanoid creature thing and hurt his friends, and wasn't able to defend them. And even if he doesn't express it, Riz is still questioning what Baron told him back in the nightmare forest.

Riz knows Baron is made out of his lies, he knows Baron isn't real, he knows their all lies, but it doesn't feel that way. Riz almost believes that he will be replaced eventually, the rest of the group will forget him eventually -- I mean, he was the "briefcase kid" before.

And what if the group figures out he isn't interested into that like other people, all the kissing and... Well, that other stuff people his age started getting into. Riz had only felt, or thought, about something like that before, but it didn't count! It was Fabian! Best friends think about each other like that from time to time too!

And that was another thing, he didn't want to tell anyone about his thoughts about Fabian. Riz felt so guilty about so many things and sometimes he'd think to himself that he shouldn't feel scared about telling the rest of The Bad Kids about these things, it _could_ be tied to Baron and his world. But he wasn't lying, no less talking, so there was no harm in this.

No harm in bottling up his feelings or thoughts, nobody had to hear or know about that for several reasons. Riz was going to keep feeling guilty and scared about everything but it wouldn't hurt anyone and that's all he cared about.

If acting the part of being okay, or just like he would normally was the only thing keeping him back, so be it! He'd act the part flawlessly.

\--

Albeit how good Riz hid his feelings and thoughts from everyone, even more specifically Adaine, someone as smart as him, Fabian could tell something was bothering him.

Fabian had been friends with Riz for not that long but he already knew Riz' body language as if he was the goblin himself, as if they had grow up together, but both those facts were far from the truth, it's maybe because of how much Fabian stared at the other when no one was looking.

But he was straight! Fabian didn't like guys and never thought of getting it off to a guy. Well, maybe Riz was an exception, but Riz was his friend and it's totally normal to have a wet dream of your best friend, right? Yeah, totally is! Lots of people do that too!

Fabian waited to approach his friend at lunch, they could at least get some peace and quiet in some empty hallway or class room, some were where they'd be alone at least.

As lunch neared Fabian gathered all the reasons why Riz could be sad or disturbed in anyway. Was someone bullying him? Would Fabian need to bash someone's head in? The Half-Elf hoped it wasn't that, but he'll be ready if it was the point.

He quickly grabbed some food from the current lunch lad(y) and quickly sat down at the Bad Kids regular table, propping himself in a way where he had his cheek in his right hand and with his left hand he was impatiently tapping his fingers on the table, waiting for Riz.

Everyone else arrived but it seemed that Riz just had to take a little longer that day to arrive at the cafeteria, just long enough for everyone to look at Fabian oddly, silently questioning about what he was waiting for, what was in his mind or if he was okay.

But Riz never arrived, the hour passed so quickly for Fabian, it felt like seconds. He ate, because of the nagging of his other friends but Riz never walked over to the table, murmuring about a case or something of the sort.

The rest of the Bad Kids told him Riz was fine, even if Adine hesitated, she just claimed that Riz would be find, he isn't a squishy Wizard, or a sore-thumb Fighter, he was a great investigator and detective.

But Fabian didn't buy it, _his_ Riz wouldn't just not appear and keep quiet about it, he'd at least leave a call - voice mail if needed - or a text message. Riz wasn't that reckless, especially not after what happened with Baron of The Baroness and all that.

So, there would be a slight hurdle in his plan, whatever. Wasn't that bad, he'd just need to go to Riz' apartment after school, that's cool, it's fine. 

\--

Riz had decided to no join the rest of the group at lunch, and didn't message or tell them anything because he _knows_ that any lie he told would be caught by anyone of them, and he was not ready for that yet, and well, the whole Baron thing as well.

He had just let himself hide away in a bathroom stall. Lots of people usually felt uncomfortable in a bathroom stall, because it was too small, but Riz was small, and this was his Kingdom.

The Goblin didn't feel the same in there though, there was no life, no Kristen joking about her religious chrisis, no Adaine helping him with a case, no Ragh and Gorgug play-fighting. No stunning Fabian sitting next to him, with his charm radiating off of him-- _No_ **_NO_** do _not_ think of Fabian like that.

'You are not worth of Fabian like that, or in anyway. You are not worth of anyone in that way at all!' He kept repeating to himself, or was it the little Baron in his head speaking? At this point, he was convinced, with tears at the brim of his eyes. 

Riz believe it, his parents were cool, but he wasn't. All those dope things he did were obsolete, like he had never done them. The voice in his head - a mix of Baron and himself - had been repeating things like that and he believed it, belived it without a fault.

The gobling staired at his sandwich with distaste, Riz had lost his apitite over all of this. He quickly rubbed away the small tears forming around his eyes. He got down from the toilet and got out, descreitly placing his sandwich into the trash bin, it had been a whole debate for a while but that's for another story.

And Riz was right on time, because the bell rung to signal the end of lunch and the start of the next period, so he silently slid out of the restroom and made his was to his next class, sulking in the way there.

\--

Once the last period had ended and Fabian met up at the entrance of the school to talk about whatever clues or just potential quest they had. They ruled out everything, especially anything about Porter, who Fig still hadn't forgotten about even between adventuring and going to school.

Fabian felt a wave of worry wash over him as he noticed something, Riz still hadn't appeared. It could be that he was sick, but again, Riz would call, he would always call him, no matter what. Riz would do it just to say he was going to his office.

So the Half-Elf decided, he'd go to Riz' place to check in on his best friend to make sure the other hadn't been kidnapped again, or worse, was killed. Even tough it was a small possiblity, there was always the chance that Riz had gotten that hurt, but it hurt Fabian to think about that small percentage.

Fabian called apond the hangman and waited few seconds before he was off to find Riz. And while he was at it, he thought about the past few weeks, months, how was Riz doing the whole time? Was he acting oddly, was there something that could of offended him, or in any other way demoralize him? Anything that could of hurt him?

Fabian constantly thought of the what ifs and the possibilities of everything that could of happened to his best friend. Possible paranoia from past events? Maybe, maybe it was something else, but that wasn't up for debate right now.

After a solid minute of thoughts and riding the hangman, He arrived at the strongtower luxury towers "I'll be back hangman" Fabian said patting his partner while getting off of him, heading for the entrance and heading for Riz' place.

The Half-Elf effortlessly jogged up the stairs - ignoring the elevator - and walked over to the apartment he had memorized, hesitation hitting him like a truck. Maybe he should have called instead of overreacting and immediately heading for Riz' place, he could of just called instead. But Fabian decided that it was a bit to late for that and knocked for the door.

He fumbled a bit, trying to think about what to say. It seemed too awkward for what was supposed to be a check up. 

\--

Riz had successfully dogged everyone he recognized and quickly walked home. The goblin always knew how the group would talk for a while infront of the school about a possible quest or something before separating. So he used the time to go home quickly without anyone noticing.

Once he got home, he headed straight to his room, whining about how loud his thoughts were, about everything. Riz knew his mom wouldn't be here for a while so he could just, sit down and try to sort out his thoughts. That just lead him to staring at his sealing, like if it was going to go anywhere.

Riz was so tired of his own thoughts and himself in general, he didn't want the Bad Kids to deal with this, to see him so weak and vulnerable. And when he heard the knock at the door, it surprised him.

God knows if it was some of those Helioic believers trying to quote on quote 'convert' him into believing in Helio - even if that was debunked a long time ago, Helio is just a frat boy - or maybe some weird business man trying to sell him a vacuum cleaner.

He had learned that his 'friends' would either call in or text him before coming over, or just baring in at best, so he wiped away the thought it could be one of his party members, it would of been out of character.

That was what Riz thought as he walked over, drously. He slowly opened the door to unveil a worried Fabian - okay so maybe they didn't text or call before arriving, taking notes - and before Riz could say anything Fabian just speed-talked, he spoke so fast that it just sounded like gibberish to Riz.

"Okay! Okay! Slow down!" Riz semi-yelled as Fabian tired to catch his breath, panting as he shook his head, placing an arm on the door frame for momentary support. 

"Are you okay? You've been acting oddly recently and I'm not sure if you're okay, has anyone been bullying you,--" Fabian started ranting on and on about if Riz was fine and about his safety, and even if this could convince Fabian was Riz' friend, the Goblin still put up his facade.

"Yeah, I'm fine. I'm sorry if I've been acting wierdly, just a bunch of case shit, nothing more" Riz tried to brush it off, but Fabian wasn't buying it, he saw threw the lies. The Half-Elf looked at the shorter one, half seriously and half reassuringly.

"Riz, please don't lie, I want you to know you can trust me." Fabian said, awkwardly placing one of his hands on Riz' shoulder in a reassuring way, and something in Riz snapped, but he tried to keep himself from falling apart right then and there.

"I-- I'm going to be honest Fabian... I haven't really been fine these past few days, it's just what Baron said in the nightmare forest and-- and it's just dumb" Riz started to admit, before halting, full force. Why would he spill out his guts to Fabian if he didn't know if the other would throw him out the next day? He already felt the tears forming at the brims of his eyes. He looked at the ground, unable to look at Fabian anymore.

"It's not dumb, your feelings are just as valid as mine _Riz_ " Fabian spoke in a reasuing tone, trying his best to convey the fact that he'd listen to the other no matter what. Riz looked up from the floor and back up to Fabian, he felt like crying so badly. Fabian just had to come over and tear down everything he had built to hide away his feelings, didn't he?

"I-- just- why? Why would you listen to me? I'm not that useful, and, you're- you know- just going to throw me away eventually" Riz cried out emotionally, the baracade breaking and the tears started to fall. The Goblin tried to wipe away all those tears, he felt like a useless little kid that just got caught doing something bad.

"Riz... What makes you believe that? You are an amazing detective, without you I don't think the group could get shit done, I think that I wouldn't of come so far as I have" Fabian started "And-- and, those late night rants with you about everything and nothing at the same time are so fun, and everything you do is great, I don't even know how to even begin describing you Riz..." He said, slowing down, slightly blushing as he realized how he must have sounded, but also for the fact that he realized that, yeah, he really likes Riz, not just as a friend.

The goblin couldn't even comprehend everything that Fabian was saying, I mean, how great he was? But he couldn't help but believe Fabian just a bit, or a lot. Riz took a while to try and calm down, trying not to sob uncontrollably. Fabian eventually neiled down to hug Riz, keeping him close to him.

"Riz, you are my best friend, but I also really like you, more than a friend. I'd never leave you, I wouldn't dream of it" Fabian spoke into Riz' ear. Riz hesitantly hugged Fabian back, but once he did, he hugged tightly. Riz felt like Fabian could suddenly disappear, and never come back.

After minutes which felt like eternity, Riz finally seemed to calm down, breathing in-and-out as Adaine had said once that it helped her calm down during panic attacks, and well, it helped a bunch. Riz just felt _content_ and _happy_ in Fabian's arms, he could finally rest after being uneasy and feeling guilty for what felt like months.

"Are you ready to talk yet?" Fabian asked, drawing back from the hug and looked at Riz. The other whined as Fabian pulled away from the hug and yawned "I'm a bit tired... Can I just sleep for now?" Riz asked quietly, a bit worried Fabian would force him to talk, but the Half-Elf just smiled and nodded.

Fabian stood up again, carrying Riz this time and bringing him to his room, gently lying Riz down onto his bed. Fabian turned towards the door to leave, but was interrupted by the feeling of his sleeve being tugged. He turned around to see Riz sitting up.

"Please... Stay.." Riz asked shyly. Fabian just chuckled, removing his Augefort letterman jacket off, placing it neatly on the desk in the room - probably Riz' old desk where he'd do his work - and joined Riz on the bed. It was quiet, but not the dreadful kind, Fabian hadn't fallen asleep yet, watching over Riz.

The Half-Elf thought his friend was asleep before hearing the goblin mumble "I like you too Fabian, more than a friend..." He said, phrase jumbled up from what could only be fatigue. Fabian softly smiled and put his arm over Riz, keeping the other close "Good night The Ball" Fabian whispered before he dozed off.

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for reading! I hope you liked it, I loved righting it.  
> I'm happy about how it came out, it's by far my longest story ever. If you want to, go check out my other stuff. I'm not sure if I'm going to continue any of them, but I got more on mind for later.


End file.
